tags: in-the-flesh
---
+For the record, this photoblog was scheduled to be posted in the last
+weekend of September; alas, due to multiple overlapping interrupts in
+both the saecular and [personal][logz-1938822] spheres, that schedule
+was pushed forward, so here I am, documenting September's trip in
+early October. Anyways, the woman and I celebrated this year's
+autumnal equinox by going on what hipsters nowadays call a "city
+break" over in the tiny town of Târgoviște.
+
+Aside from being a common toponym in this region of Europe, the name
+"târgoviște" is a (seemingly) convoluted (and at the same time very
+short) way of saying "that place/town where they hold a
+marketplace". So let's deconstruct it together: the first part of the
+word, "târg", literally means "marketplace", although in some other
+contexts it means "bargain". The "ov" particle is Slavic in origin;
+[wiktionary][ov-wiktionary] says it must have something to do with
+patronyms, though it's unlikely this is the case here; rather, the
+second etymological explanation from Russian, i.e. the genitive plural
+desinence thingie, might be closer to the truth, which would make
+"târgov" something along the lines of "of marketplace".
+
+Now, Romanian (among others) has this mechanism where affixing
+something to a word indicates a new related thing. For example
+"târgoveț" is a person who spends their time in a marketplace, or more
+generally someone who lives in a town -- which would make the English
+translation of "târgoviște" more along the lines of "the place where
+they have a town"[^1], or rather, "the capital", which, redundantly
+enough, is what our Târgoviște was for some centuries before Bucharest
+became fashionable. This might indicate that the town's name came into
+existence through usage rather than through some bureaucratic decree,
+but anyway. As for the "iște" suffix, it's common in agriculture,
+where it denotes bunches of things, e.g. "grâiște" is where they
+cultivate "grâu", i.e. grain.
+
+So then, a târgoviște is a bunch of târgoveți; or a bunch of
+marketplaces; or put in simpler terms, the place where most business
+goes -- actually, the main place for business during medieval times in
+the Wallachian state. This is where, say, your beloved "Dracula" held
+court during his reign, and so where the lordly[^2] court can be
+found. And now that we're done with this lengthy intro, let's get to
+the meat of this short journey.
+
+Below: look ma, no arms!
+
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-01.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-01-thumb.png"> </a>
+<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-03.png"> <img align="middle"
+class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-03-thumb.png"> </a>
+
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-02.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-02-thumb.png"> </a>
-<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-03.png"> <img align="middle"
-class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-03-thumb.png"> </a>
+Above: to be honest, I find this combination of disparate elements
+rather disconcerting; the citizens of Târgoviște seem to like it
+though, so who am I to argue. Below: creepy old house.
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-04.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-04-thumb.png"> </a>
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-07.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-07-thumb.png"> </a>
+Above: noods, courtesy of one Vasile Blendea, painter and
+sculptor. They, by which I mean the cute lady guiding us through the
+museum, say he was good friends with Nicolae Iorga, who also helped
+Blendea with his studies. This should explain the following:
+
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-08.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-08-thumb.png"> </a>
+Some people told me my "arfistic" choices with respect to photo
+processing are very weird: either the subject is too dark, too light,
+too contrasty, not constrasty enough, too colourful, too desaturated
+and so on and so forth. All this tells me is that they never sat to
+wonder what exactly leads me to such choices, what else.
+
+Take the photo above for example, and try to answer: what does it
+represent and why is there no colour in there? Is it that I wanted to
+make it look old because the man -- cela n'est pas un homme, n'est-ce
+pas? -- is old? Is it that I wanted to make it look "noir" for some
+unknown reason, or what? And now that we've uttered these questions,
+let's take a closer look at the subject, a white gypsum statuette:
+what do you think would be gained by adding colours (other than the
+shades of gray we see) to it? and how is it relevant to the photo?
+
+Well, there you have it. Below: a list of medieval Wallachian
+rulers. Now, let's be honest with ourselves, dear people who call
+yourselves Romanians: a few of those names represent actual people,
+yes, but you don't need more than a hand to cound the subset of actual
+people in that list, as opposed to the cocksucker derpity-derps who've
+derped around all the way since Mircea to Constantin. Take Vlad IV for
+example: there's a reason they call him "Înecatul", namely that that's
+the most notable event of his life. And with this, I think we're
+settled on these guys' importance -- and since we're here, with the
+importance of the guys you're voting for in your time.
+
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-09.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-09-thumb.png"> </a>
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-10.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-10-thumb.png"> </a>
+<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-16.png"> <img align="middle"
+class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-16-thumb.png"> </a>
+
+Above: Romanian writing, approximately mid and (respectively) late
+nineteenth century. Notice the mixed script in that first one? Funnily
+enough, the same Treboniu Laurian would (just a bit later) hate on any
+and everything non-Latin in this Romanian language, to the point of
+acute [uncleftishness][logz-1935969].
+
+Below: a sunny day in ye olde Târgoviște.
+
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-11.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-11-thumb.png"> </a>
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-12.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-12-thumb.png"> </a>
+Further below: pornography straight from the Paleolithic, exposed (as
+reproductions, I suspect) in this little cute "museum of human
+evolution" downtown. Speaking of which, the museum was built "to
+European standards", they say, which yes, puts it a notch above [that
+shit in Sibiu][altemberger]. On the other hand I don't know what to
+say about the low-quality photos and Google Maps screenshots... only
+that I bet they siphoned a lot of money through this project.
+
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-13.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-13-thumb.png"> </a>
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-15.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-15-thumb.png"> </a>
-<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-16.png"> <img align="middle"
-class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-16-thumb.png"> </a>
+Above: pornography of a different kind. Below: the history museum
+hosts some paintings, among which one by a dude I've never heard about
+before. Let's give him a moment in the tarpitian spotlight.
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-17.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-17-thumb.png"> </a>
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-18.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-18-thumb.png"> </a>
+Above: two planes crossing the sky in the sunset, above ye olde
+Târgoviște. Below: the last photo in this series...
+
<a href="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-19.png"> <img align="middle"
class="thumb" src="/uploads/2019/10/targoviste-19-thumb.png"> </a>
+
+... what they call "the old centre" there, namely a bunch of cafés and
+pubs lined together on a couple of streets. That's how you know you're
+in a town populated by orcs: they sheepishly distort the meaning of
+something towards anything other than what it actually means, on the
+basis of the (actual) item in question looking vaguely similar to
+something they've seen before, somewhere else. They went to "da big
+town" -- they call it "la oraș" around those parts, I'm not shitting
+you! --, you see, and saw how one of those "centru vechi" looks, so
+they decided to make a "centru vechi" of their own. Only there's no
+vechi whatsoever in their centru; or if that's old, then what the fuck
+have you to say about those ruins you so proudly expose in that
+*other* centre, you dumbasses?
+
+And here's another sign of deeply ingrained orcishness in this little
+town: if you're there unmotorized and want to leave, do it before
+seventeen hours, or else prepare to be stranded until the next day:
+the last train to Bucharest leaves around five PM, and while there are
+supposedly buses available, none of them stick to any schedule, either
+displayed online or as communicated through phone. Sure, Bucharest is
+less than two hours away and we have a meatwot, so the extra hours
+spent sipping on hot chocolate didn't bother us. This ain't about us
+though.
+
+Long story short: Târgoviște is a clean little town, fulla young ones
+and plenty of stuff to see. It takes more than a day to see
+everything, but even if you plan to go there for a short trip, the
+second one isn't really worth it.
+
+[^1]: "Târg" may also denote a small town in this language. Hey, don't
+ blame me, I'm just the messenger.
+
+[^2]: I don't know how else to put it, so who knows, someone apter
+ than me at this linguistics/history thing might illuminate me.
+
+ "Curtea Domnească" is literally "the court of the Domn", where
+ "Domn" is what local rulers called themselves. The word comes from
+ the Latin "Dominus", i.e. a master, ruler, king, etc. However,
+ Wallachia and Moldavia weren't ever really sovereign, much like,
+ despite tons of pretense, today's Romania isn't really a sovereign
+ -- sovereign entities don't abide by whatever random rules are set
+ in place by external parties, do they? And so, much like today's
+ Romania sucks up to NATO and the EU, medieval Wallachia sucked up
+ to the High Porte. Yes, Vlad and Ștefan did burn and impale a few
+ thousands of Ottoman fuckers when they tried to undermine their
+ religious independence, but they still paid that tribute to keep
+ their heads in place.
+
+ So then, I think it'd way too much to say that Wallachian and
+ Moldavian voyvods were "Domini" in the true sense of the
+ word. Lords, surely, and "pământeni", i.e. of the land, as opposed
+ to the more recent Phanariote rule; but they paid well to hold
+ their castles and, as can be seen in Vlad the Third's case, they
+ otherwise paid with their life once external (and local, for that
+ matter) support ceased to exist.
+
+[logz-1938822]: http://logs.nosuchlabs.com/log/trilema/2019-09-28#1938822
+[ov-wiktionary]: http://archive.is/YJRl4
+[logz-1935969]: http://logs.ossasepia.com/log/trilema/2019-09-13#1935969
+[altemberger]: /posts/y05/07d-klausenburg.html#selection-296.0-296.3
projects / thetarpit.git / commitdiff